Why Mitt Romney is an idiot…

Yes I’m a Mormon. Yes I live in Utah. This does not mean I’m a Republican. The very thought of it brings vomitous chunks to my throat. As a social worker, Republicans typically vote against everything that I consider moral and socially ethical.

As you can tell I was not one of the voters who gave Mitt Romney his 88% victory in the Utah primary. Everytime I hear Mitt speak I am overwhelmed with how out of touch he is with mainstream America and reality.

This became even more clear to me in his speech when he “suspended” his bid for the Presidential election. He said that he wanted to make sure that the Republicans win in November because if Clinton or Obama win that will mean that his campaign is essentially aiding a surrender to terror. Is he effing kidding?

The fact that another Republican is using scare tactics to ensure a Republican victory is so abhorrent to me (hello, Giuliani and GWB) those vomitous chunks are starting to rise again. If anyone thinks that the war in Iraq is about the “war on terror,” they’re about 6 years behind the truth and severly deluded.

What Mitt doesn’t understand is that no one is buying these tactics anymore, except the aforementioned severly deluded. Most Americans are sick to death of Republican incompetance, lies, the shitty economy, and the almost 4,000 troops dead for no reason. The Republicans don’t stand a chance in November, especially not after the Titanic of the Bush presidency. So, shut your pie hole Mitt unless you’re going to tell the truth. You’re “suspending” your campaign because you can’t win and your wife won’t let you spend any more of the $60 million of your own money you’ve already spent on pursuing this “hobby.”

(And futhermore, what the eff kind of a name is Mitt anyway?)


What the french, Toast?

This is my all-time favorite commercial.

The first time I saw it I almost peed my pants from laughing so hard.

A while after it began airing, my brother and I were watching TV in a hospital waiting room and this commercial came on. It made us laugh during a time when the ability to laugh seemed like a million miles away.

My brother and I like to greet each other with “What the french, Toast?” Now we’ve added, “you son of a biscuit-eating bull dog,” “who you callin’ a cootie queen you lint licker,” “pickle you, kumquat,” and “stinky mcstink face.”

I want to shake the hands of the add agency that came up with this! Orbitz gum always has funny commercials, but this is by far the best one. If you can make someone laugh while their mother is dying of cancer, I say your commercial deserves an award.