How I feel about turning 30

I think the picture says it all.


I hate Incompetence at Fast Food Restaurants

I know jobs at fast food restaurants suck. We all know they do. They don’t pay well and the work is hard. I’ve had jobs like that too. I can’t say that I showed up every day and gave my best, but at least I never smoked a doobie before going to work.

The other day I went to my local Burger King for dinner. I pulled up to the drive through and was immediately told they’d be with me in a just a minute. That was fine, I have no problem with that. However, I just happened to look at the clock right after they said that and noted that it took them a full seven minutes to get back to me. Seven minutes. I almost pulled away. I ordered my food and it wasn’t a difficult order with a lot of changes or special orders. I pulled up to the second window, paid my money, and was told to pull around front to the front doors. Which was fine…I have no problem doing that either. That was until the guy came out with four bags and asked me to pick which one was mine. None of them were because I ordered a burger AND fries. So the douche went back in to get my fries.

Here’s the part of the story that takes the cake…I was already frustrated with the lack of customer service I experienced there. Then I opened my bag and found that I was given a single burger instead of the double cheeseburger I ordered. Oh, another little surprise I encountered was half of my french fries were effing onion rings. So I called this store and asked to speak to the manager. I doubt the guy I talked to was the manager. He never apologized, only asked me to come back and fix my order. I said, “no, I’m never coming back.” And when he didn’t really respond, I said “whatever” and hung up.

I worked in customer service for a bazillion years and the thing I know beyond a shadow of doubt is that if a customer complains to the manager, they fall all over themselves apologizing. The last thing a manager wants is to lose a customer because said manager knows that said customer will complain to all their friends and they’ll lose even more customers. Customers equal money and no manager wants to lose that. So I highly doubt the douche I spoke to on the phone was the manager.

People, I know working at Burger King, and other restaurants of it’s ilk, sucks. But please, do your weed smoking after your shift so when I order fries I get all fries and not a half fry/half onion ring combo. Because I don’t like onion rings. But not as much as I don’t like incompetence service.

I Hate Pencils

I have always preferred mechanical pencils over regular pencils. They’re always sharp, you can replace the eraser and lead, you can retract the lead so you don’t write on anything when you’re not using it, and they make the cool little clicking noise when you advance the lead into the chamber. I have another reason to prefer mechanical pencils over the standard wooden ones….I’ve never stabbed myself with a mechanical pencil.

Yesterday I was walking to my car and grabbing my keys out of my purse, when a pencil I had in my purse came flying out, stabbed me in the foot, got caught on my jeans, and the lead (or graphite) broke off into my foot. All of this happened in a split second and before I knew what was happening. Within seconds the pain in my foot was awful and I limped to my car with thoughts of gangrene and amputation. Of course it was my right foot, so I had to push the gas pedal with it. Everytime I stepped on the gas, searing pain would shoot up my foot and into my leg. I got home, wiped off the blood and decided that the lead wasn’t in my foot.

This isn’t the first time I’ve stabbed myself with a pencil. During a Stake play where I played a Secretary, the director gave me a clipboard and pencil for my props and then saw it fit to sharpen this pencil as sharp as she could have possibly gotten it. During the performance while dancing and singing my little heart out, I stabbed myself with this stupid pencil in my thumb. Ever the professional, I kept right on going despite the flowing blood and the curse words wanting to flow from my mouth. I thought I got all the lead out later, but still to this day, 14 years later, I still have a faint black mark on my thumb.

Damn pencils. I hate pencils.

The mark where the evil wooden pencil got me.

Not Sophia!

It’s the end of an era. Estelle Getty, the actress that played the wonderfully sarcastic Sophia Petrillo on “Golden Girls,” died today. She was 84.

I loved “Golden Girls.” Of course I was a grade-schooler when the popular NBC sitcom had it’s run. Being a grade-schooler, I had nothing better to do on Saturday nights than to watch GG. I remember many Saturday nights laying on my parent’s bed watching GG with my Mom, and all the shows like “Empty Nest” that came after it. I remember thinking it was hilarious and never knew, back then, it was revolutionary to have women in their 50s and 60s be the subject of a major network sitcom.

Years later, the Lifetime network, brought GG back in reruns, and for me, it was appointment television. The best thing about re-watching a show you loved as a child is you finally get all the jokes. Man, that show is dirty! Sophia is and always will be my favorite. I want to be like Sophia when I grow up. They tried to blame her forthrightness on a stroke she had, but really, I think Sophia finally stopped caring what other people thought and decided to speak her mind. I’ve probably seen every single GG episode two or maybe even five times and I still laugh out loud. Just the other night I was in tears over an episode I know I’ve seen more than once.

I loved how Sophia always started a story with “Picture it, Siciliy, [insert date here].” Once, when Dorothy accused her mother of making up a story her answer was:

“So what? I’m old, I’m supposed to be colorful.”

And she was, oh yes she was.

Read all about it

Have you ever read a news story on the ‘net and wondered what other people thought of it? I, on occasion, will read the comments made by other readers after I have read a news story online. It’s usually the news stories that leave me outraged that I read the readers’ comments. I do this to see if others are as outraged as I am. However, I have decided that people who actually take the time to comment on news stories on a semi-regular basis are not very smart and have a lot of time on their hands. A dangerous combination for sure.

I’ve read some really interesting comments as of late. Most of the comments that leave me wondering about how the species is going to survive if natural selection is a real thing come from Which basically means, Utahns (at least the ones making comments) are dumb. The one comment that had me the most incredulous followed an article about Elizabeth Smart. This commentor (is that a word?) said that the whole abduction was a conspiracy and that the Smarts hired the kidnappers so that they could hide Elizabeth’s unwanted pregnancy, and once she gave birth and gave up the baby, she was allowed to be found. Seriously. There is someone out there that actually believes this is true. First of all, a teen pregnancy isn’t a social taboo now that parents would actually hire someone to kidnap their daughter to cover it up. Second of all, who did Elizabeth place this baby with for adoption (if the theory was true)? Was it the same person who helped Lee Harvey Oswald kill Kennedy and staged the whole moon walk thing? I just hope that this commentor gets the anti-psychotic drugs he so desperately needs.

Some other comment thats had me wondering how some people are able to live on their own and survive was about an article I read today about a South Salt Lake man who left his 2 year old child in the car so that he could go see a middle-of-the-night showing of “The Dark Knight.” Of course I was outraged that this man would put his child in such a dangerous situation as most of the commentors were. However, one person actually said that what this idiot did wasn’t that bad. Seriously, did you eat paint chips as a child? Another commentor blamed America’s obsession with Batman as the reason this man was willing to put his child in danger to get his “superhero fix.” No sir (I assume you’re a sir), it wasn’t Batman’s fault that he left his child in his car unattended. It was his fault for being an IRRESPONSIBLE IDIOT! He probably has left his child unattended in a car before and my only hope is that not only does he no longer procreate, but he loses custody of the one child he was so carelessly parenting.

And don’t even get me started on the comments I read about the Sock Obama. It left me wondering about the people I live around and if they’re really that racist, prejudice, and cruel. I was more ashamed to be a Utahn because of the comments on the story than the actual story itself. And the Mormon haters always come out when there’s an article about the LDS church or anything affliated with it.

So my point is this. I’m no longer reading reader’s comments. They always devolve into fights between people, name calling, nonsensical arguments, and especially on ksl, liberals are somehow blamed for everything. What I really can’t stand is people who are unable to spell or put together a logical coherent sentence taking up cyberspace with their unintellible rants. When I read comments I usually end up madder than I started, so what’s the point?

Feel free to leave your comments….

100 Things You Don’t Know About Me

I’m a big Copy Cat. My sister-in-law Holly has a cooler-than-a-Slurpee blog and her latest post talks about the 100 things you don’t know about her. Unfortunately for Holly, I knew some of those things already. So here it goes, 100 things you (might) not know about me…

1 – I spent a great deal of my childhood (especially in the summer time) watching Soap Operas. For a time I was addicted to “One Life to Live,” and then later it was “General Hospital.” I stopped watching GH when Johnathon Jackson left the show as Lucky. It just wasn’t worth it after that.

2 – Even though I was 5 when he was born, I resented my baby brother until I was in junior high. Now I love him to pieces!

3 – I honestly and truly don’t know how I lucked out into making someone as wonderful as Casey Stringham fall in love with me. I don’t deserve him in any way.

4 – Madonna’s song “Like a Virgin” started my sexual education after I asked my Mom what a virgin was.

5 – Because I was so teased and tormented from kindergarten to 9th grade, I have a hard time believing that anyone likes me or wants to be my friend.

6 – I have a steel-trap mind. You tell me something once and I will remember it for eternity.

7 – I will kick any one’s butt at Pop trivia. Except if it’s about sports.

8 – My favorite actress is Grace Kelly. Grace continues to be my favorite name ever.

9 – I love watching documentaries.

10 – I knew George W. Bush was a fraud/hack/demon seed before he won the Republican nomination in 2000. I knew he’d screw it up when the Supreme Court illegally gave him the presidency, and guess what, I was right.

11 – I had the names Reilley Beth and Pyper Grace picked out as my daughter’s names since high school. Luckily my husband likes those names as well.

12 – I always somehow knew my life’s work would be in adoption.

13 – Having a LDS mother who was inactive and a non-member father always made me feel like an outsider. It wasn’t until I was an adult that I realized the depth and empathy it gave me and how remarkable it was that my brother and sister and I went to church by ourselves when we were young.

14 – As politically liberal as I am, I don’t think that a death sentence is cruel and unusual punishment for child molesters.

15 – Speaking of politics, I don’t like to “discuss” (ne argue) politics because I think it’s a waste of time. You’re not going to change my opinion and I’m not going to change yours, so what’s the point? Besides I know I’m right.

16 – I don’t believe morality has anything to do with following a set of rules (e.g. premarital sex, etc.). I think it’s all about how you treat the “least of these.”

17 – Growing up I simultaneously worshipped my sister and hated her. I desperately wanted to be like her and hated her because I thought she didn’t love me. Now I know better and she’s my bestest friend.

18 – My mom was always trying to make me be best friends with the next door neighbor girl growing up. I thought she was vapid and stuck-up. It wasn’t until we attended her bridal shower 20 years later did my Mom agree with me and apologize for always pushing us together.

19 – As a child I wanted to be a fashion designer when I grew up. I spent many hours coloring drawings on my Fashion Plates (remember those?) and making handkerchiefs into spiffy outfits for my Barbies.

20 – I was a rather rebellious 13-year-old. I had a friend who was a “bad influence” and we used to sneak out and meet boys. By 14, I had out-grown this.

21 – In high school I had zero school pride and still don’t.

22 – Despite #21, I still know the words to the school hymn. I told you I never forget anything.

23 – My biggest fear in life, besides something bad happening to my children, is getting Alzheimer’s when I’m older because my memory is so good now. It would by life’s cruel irony.

24 – I think that in almost all cases, the book is better than the movie.

25 – My favorite time of day is when my children are asleep. I feel like a bad mom for admitting that.

26 – One of my most favorite parts of summer growing up was driving down to Sugar House to get a 3 gallon drum of Malted Milk ice cream from Snelgrove’s. Now they don’t make it anymore and I miss it so badly. I would sell at least one pair of my shoes for a taste of it again.

27 – Most of my happiest memories from childhood are wrapped up in my mother.

28 – I’m addicted to shoes. Although this is probably a known fact, what you might not know is that even though at one point I had over 100 pairs, I never think I have enough.

29 – I’m addicted to playing Bejeweled 2 on

30 – I always felt like the ugly duckling in my sorority.

31 – I watch way more TV than I should. During the writer’s strike, I was addicted to Law and Order: Special Victim’s Unit. Now that I’ve seen all the episodes, I don’t watch it as much.

32 – In my Calculus class in high school I used to look around at people and used to be incredulous that they actually comprehended the material. It was like a foreign language to me.

33 – I take a sick pleasure out of doing Algebra problems. And when I got a problem right in my Statistics class, I felt like I had conquered the world.

34 – I think sports are dumb and don’t understand why people get so passionate about them.

35 – I think OJ Simpson killed his wife, the same with Robert Blake, and I’m 100% sure that Kobe Bryant raped that girl.

36 – I’m pro-choice and pro gay marriage and I don’t care what anyone else says.

37 – I have voted in every single election since I turned 18. And I’m not talking just about Presidential elections. I have voted every year except 2007, because my Mom passed away that day.

38 – I’m a homebody. I don’t like it when people drop by unannounced because 9 times out of 10 my house will be a mess and I will be in my pajamas.

39 – I hate housework more than anything in the world. And I don’t think that just because I have a vagina, I should be responsible for most of it.

40 – I WAS Angela Chase in high school.

41 – And I still have a crush on Jordan Catalano.

42 – I read Perez Hilton every day and feel soooo guilty about it.

43 – I’m seriously picky when it comes to food and hate trying new things.

44 – My junior year of high school, my friends and I would sit by our lockers and play Egyptian rat screw every lunch period.

45 – One of my roommates/bridesmaids threw me a bachelorette party that was so lame that people fell asleep. I cried about it the next day.

46 – And yet, my co-workers threw me a bachelorette party (co-ed) by going clubbing and it was a helluva lot of fun.

47 – I’m ignoring the fact that I’m turning 30 and will remain 29 in my denial stricken mind forever.

48 – I believe that Wal-Mart is evil. Any company that is that wealthy and then encourages its employees to go on public assistance so they can avoid giving them health benefits (along with a very long list of evil doings) doesn’t deserve my money or patronage.

49 – I hate waiting. I’m not patient and I grow bitchier with every minute I’m forced to wait at the doctor’s office/grocery store line/restaurant.

50 – I think hunting for sport is wrong.

51 – I had a class with a bunch of people who were studying to become Elementary school teachers and was constantly amazed at their stupidity. This didn’t give me much confidence in my children’s education down the road.

52 – I can speak in a chipmunk voice but the only time I really do is when I talk to my best friend Jessica.

53 – Speaking of Jessica, we once went toilet papering but instead of using toilet paper we littered a guy’s yard, that we didn’t like, with tampons and maxi pads.

54 – I had a crush on Brad Pitt before anyone else knew who he was. In 8th grade I saw a picture of him in US Weekly right after “Thelma & Louise” came out and thought he was so gorgeous I wrote “I love Brad Pitt” all over my trapper keeper. Some girl asked me if Brad Pitt was my boyfriend and then made fun of me for having a boyfriend with the last name of Pitt (like armpit). I wonder if she’s laughing now.

55 – I like watching “Drake & Josh.” I think Josh is funny and I don’t think Drake is cute.

56 – I’ve had a crush on Christian Bale since “Newsies.” Even watching “American Psycho” didn’t deter my crush. Which makes me wonder what kind of sick puppy I am.

57 – My freshman year in college I was seriously in denial about my bra size. My friends practically forced me to go to Victoria’s Secret and buy a D cup. I was convinced I was a C.

58 – I screen my phone calls.

59 – I stick my foot in my mouth on a semi-regular basis.

60 – I believe horoscopes are true. Not the day-to-day stuff, but most people I know are eerily similar to their sign.

61 – I don’t like lettuce and most people make fun of the fact that I refuse to eat salads or just have cheese and meat on my sandwiches. I don’t understand the point of eating a bowl of leaves that is so tasteless you have to dump dressing all over to make it edible.

62 – Clowns scare me.

63 – I hate the sensation of falling, but am not afraid of heights.

64 – My college friends and I once snuck into Layton Surf n Swim after hours and went swimming, which was pretty dumb since it’s next door to a police station. My jeans got stuck on the fence and I had to spend the rest of my evening with a big rip in my butt.

65 – I will only eat plain cheese pizza.

66 – I fell asleep on the Staten Island ferry.

67 – I’ve seen “Beauty and the Beast” and “The Color Purple” on Broadway in NYC. I was the only one in the audience who gave Beauty a standing ovation. I learned what a jaded New York audience was that day. I was practically the only white person in the audience for Purple. And it rocked!

68 – I honestly don’t care what other people think of me.

69 – A missionary once called me a skank. And this was in front of my husband. Amazingly, we let this missionary live.

70 – My best friend and I made up a song called “Camp Gottagopee” about my family’s property in Blacksmith Fork Canyon.

71 – Speaking of Blacksmith Fork Canyon, I made out with my cousin’s friend there when I was 18.

72 – And another Blacksmith Fork Canyon item, I spent many a happy summer day tubing down the BlackSmith Fork River with my cousins. Once we went so far down the river, I stuck out my thumb and hitched us a ride back to camp. We got a big lecture about it later from our parents.

73 – Every time I see the Utah mountains in the distance when I’m heading west on I-80, I cry tears of joy.

74 – The happy place I go to in my mind is sitting on a lounge chair at my grandma’s condo in Florida facing the Atlantic Ocean.

75 – My maternal Grandpa is my hero. I was a grandpa’s girl the same way some girls are Daddy’s girls.

76 – In elementary school I had to spend recess inside during the winter time because of my asthma stricken lungs.

77 – I taught my brother how to play poker.

78 – I hate talk radio because my Dad used to listen to so much of it while I was growing up. Because of him, “This Old House,” “The Joy of Painting,” and “The Frugal Gourmet” will always be linked to Saturday morning in my mind.

79 – I miss coming home after church on Sundays to one of my Dad’s homemade meals.

80 – Christmas isn’t Christmas to me until I taste kleiner dough.

81 – I secretly believe that I am my in-laws’ favorite child-in-law.

82 – I’ve seen every episode of “The Real World” and long for the days when the roommates had intelligent discussions instead of getting drunk and having sex with each other.

83 – I bite my tongue a lot, but Casey always knows what I’m thinking.

84 – I’ve walked across the Brooklyn Bridge.

85 – I think Oprah has lost touch with real people and is incredibly self-important.

86 – I must sleep on a cold pillow.

87 – I’m the only woman at work who doesn’t mind having to wear a skirt or dress everyday. I used to work at a place where I was forced to wear a uniform and apron and went home smelling like chicken grease. It really doesn’t bother me to dress up now.

88 – My sister, brother, and I all learned how to drive on our parent’s minivan that we affectionately named Bessie. I cried the day my dad donated Bessie to charity. So many good times were had in the old girl.

89 – I once got in trouble in 7th grade for being a part of a food fight in the cafeteria.

90 – My friends and I dressed up in 70s gear when we went and saw the Brady Bunch Movie in the theater. We then proceeded to do the dance they do on the escalator in the middle of the Ogden Mall.

91 – When I was 4, my parents lost me at Lagoon.

92 – My brother and I rented “Tommy Boy” so many times, that my Mom finally went out and bought it for us.

93 – A baby doll tee that I bought at a Weezer concert scored me many a boyfriend in college.

94 – I hate hearing the sound of my voice on a recording.

95 – My roommate in college once asked me why I only date “ugly guys” (nice, huh) and I told her that I never thought I was cute enough to get a cute guy to like me. She looked at me and said “what are you talking about, you’re gorgeous.” After that I started dating my husband. Who is cute, btw.

96 – My sister-in-law Holly taught me how to text.

97 – In high school, I only wore clothes that were bought in a thrift store or I dug of my Mom’s closet from the 70s.

98 – No matter how many times I’ve seen “Steel Magnolias,” I always cry.

99 – I’m afraid of my children becoming teenagers.

100 – Despite all outward appearances to the contrary, or how stoic I seem, losing my Mom is the worst emotional tragedy I have ever suffered and every day I wake up praying that it’s not true. I miss her every hour of every minute of every day.

Back to reading

Every Saturday of my young life was spent being taken to my piano lessons at Mrs. Edward’s house and then to the libary with my Mom. If I was lucky, we’d go to the Ogden Mall and eat a Cheese Dog at Hog Dog On-A-Stick for lunch. And if I was REALLY lucky, my Mom would also get me a cookie from Mrs. Fields. This trip to the library every Saturday was a tradition because my Mom was an avid, avid reader. She had her name on so many waiting lists for different books that all of the librarians knew her by name.

My Mom passed the love of reading and books onto me. Every summer the school district would pass out a summer reading list and give awards to kids who read 20 age appropriate books during the summer. I always read over 200 books and got my own special award. My life has been so full of good books that I can scarcely remember a time when I wasn’t reading a book for pleasure. In fact, I was an English minor simply for the fact that I knew I was going to be required to read a lot of good books, and not because it would help me in my major field (although it has).

Since my Mom passed 8 months ago, I haven’t been able to read a single book. I started a book twice and took no joy out of reading it. I couldn’t even study for the Social Work licensing exams because I was so distracted. I don’t know if it was my grief or the fact that reading to me has always been so tied up in my Mom. We shared so many books together and whenever she read a book she knew I would like, she would pass it on to me. I guess in a way we had our own private book club because we could talk for hours about the books we read.

After hearing many great things about a book called “Water for Elephants,” I decided to buy it and read it while on maternity leave. I forgot what it was like to be so engrossed in a book that you will defy extreme tiredness or hunger just to get to the next page. I forgot what it was like to spend an entire afternoon so encapsulated by a book you don’t notice the hours that have passed until you have to turn the lights on because you can’t see the words anymore. I haven’t finished this book yet, but so far it is excellent. It’s restored a piece of me back to myself that I lost when I lost my Mom. So for now, I’m back to reading.