The great Badger fight

Sunday night the hubs was getting ready for a business trip the next morning. His brother let him borrow his steamer to steam his suit and then gave him a pants press because he never uses it. The hubs was lifting it out of the back of our car, when a piece broke and the momentum put it squarely a couple of inches into the flesh right above the hubs’ eyebrow. I rushed him to the emergency room for stitches. The poor guy had to get up really early the next day (we’re talking 4 am early) and we didn’t get out of the emergency room until well after midnight. While we waited, we came up with a Top 10 list of reasons he could give for the big gash and stitches in his forehead if people ask while he’s on his business trip. We were giggling at our own silliness and I thought I’d share. My motto is if you don’t laugh, you’ll cry. Better to laugh at the absolute suckiness of the situation than get depressed about it.

Top 10
10. Marisa threw a Badger at the hubs because he wouldn’t stop talking during one of her shows.
9. The hubs was showing Michael Jackson how funky, strong is his fight, when he realized it doesn’t matter who’s wrong or who’s right, so he beat it.
8. The hubs was strolling along the yellow brick road with his pals the straw guy, the metal dude, and a whiny tiger when a particularly cranky tree started throwing apples at his noggin’.
7. The hubs was hired to start a war so he kidnapped Princess Buttercup. When the man in black appeared to rescue the Princess he challenged the hubs to a sword fight, where he took a cheap shot at his forehead. The hubs’ friend Fezzik was right, people in masks cannot be trusted.
6. The hubs and his friends were going after a treasure in order to rescue their small town from being sold to a developer who wanted to turn it into a golf course. They were followed by the Fratelli’s who tied them up on an old pirate ship. When they tried to escape, the hubs tripped on One Eyed Willie’s bones and landed face first into his booty.
5. The hubs was getting into this time machine to rescue Doc Brown from himself in the future when the stupid DeLorean’s flippy door caught him right in the eyebrow.
4. The Union army burned down the hubs’ plantation, Tara, and when he ripped the curtains down to make a dress, the curtain rod it him in the eye.
3. When the hubs tried to join an all girls baseball team during World War II, Madonna pitched a high fast one and it beamed him right above his eye. Luckily the ball wasn’t thrown by Kit.
2. A cyborg from the future was sent to eliminate the hubs because he is the father of the future leader of the war between humans and machines.
1. The hubs was jumped in by his Computer Guild. Man, those WoW geeks are hard core.

2 thoughts on “The great Badger fight

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